By Jayne Connery, Founder, Care Campaign for the Vulnerable
There is no doubt that strong leadership in care requires skill, resilience, vision and accountability. It calls for individuals who can navigate regulation, staffing pressures, safeguarding responsibilities, financial realities and the increasing complexity of supporting an ageing population with dignity and compassion. But alongside all of this, there is another quality that deserves far greater recognition in the leadership conversation: lived experience.
Some of the most valuable insights in care do not always come from boardrooms, policy papers or strategy meetings. They come from daughters, sons, husbands, wives, carers and families who have lived through the system at its most challenging and at its most vulnerable. They come from those who have sat at bedsides, attended safeguarding meetings, navigated hospital discharges, questioned unexplained injuries, fought for funding, and experienced the emotional weight of handing over the care of someone they love to others.
This is not to suggest that lived experience should replace professional knowledge. Far from it. The care sector needs talented, qualified and committed leaders more than ever. But leadership in care is at its strongest when professional expertise is informed by human experience. When those shaping services truly understand what care feels like from the other side, the decisions they make are often more grounded, more compassionate and more likely to create environments where both residents and staff can thrive.
I have long believed that the voices of families should not be treated as an afterthought. They should be seen as a valuable source of insight. Families often notice things that data alone will not show. They understand the emotional reality of care in a way that cannot be taught through policy documents alone. They know what reassurance feels like, what anxiety feels like, and what it means to leave a care home, either comforted or unsettled and concerned.
Over the years, I have also found myself sitting down with many senior leaders during some of the most difficult moments a care home can face. These are not easy conversations. They often come at times of concern, distress or when something has gone wrong. Yet what I have seen in many of those moments are people who genuinely care. People who understand the enormity of their responsibility and who recognise that behind every incident, every complaint or investigation, there are human beings – residents, families and staff – all affected in different ways.
In those conversations, it becomes very clear that we are all human. Care is not delivered by systems alone; it is delivered by people. And leadership in care is not tested only when everything is running smoothly, but when things become difficult, and decisions must be made with honesty and integrity.
What often stands out most are those leaders whose perspectives have been shaped by lived experience – individuals who have cared for relatives themselves, who have seen the system from a family’s perspective, or who have allowed difficult experiences to open their eyes rather than close ranks. I have also met many remarkable men and women in leadership positions who began their careers working directly in care, often starting as carers and steadily working their way up through the profession. That kind of journey brings with it a depth of understanding that cannot be taught in a boardroom. These are the leaders who tend to listen more closely, reflect more deeply and respond with greater empathy, because true leadership in care is not defined simply by what goes wrong. It is defined by how those moments are handled and how they are put right.
The strongest leaders are those who do not shy away from accountability but recognise that learning, transparency and compassion must sit at the heart of improvement. They understand that families are not adversaries but partners in care. They recognise that openness builds trust, and that trust is one of the most valuable foundations a care service can have.
Lived experience also plays a powerful role in shaping culture. In a sector that is too often judged only when something goes wrong, there is a real opportunity to listen more closely to those who have seen both the very best and the very worst of care. Their experiences can help leaders identify what truly matters on the ground – how residents are spoken to, how concerns are handled, whether dignity is upheld in practice, and whether a home feels warm, calm and respectful rather than simply well presented.
The strongest leaders in care are often those who remain open to learning from every angle. They are not threatened by challenge. They do not see the voice of a family member, campaigner or advocate as inconvenient. Instead, they recognise that honest reflection is part of progress. It takes confidence to lead with openness, and it takes maturity to understand that listening to lived experience is not a weakness but a strength.
This is especially important in dementia care, where families so often carry not just grief and exhaustion, but knowledge. They know the person behind the diagnosis. They know their routines, their fears, their comfort, their humour and their history. That knowledge is vital. Good leadership recognises that care is never only about task completion but about understanding the individual, and that understanding is often held most closely by those who love them.
As care continues to evolve and we rightly talk more about innovation, workforce pressures, and new models of support, we must be careful not to lose sight of the human insight that sits at the centre of good care. Strategy matters. Policy matters. Investment matters. But so too does experience – real lived experience – the kind that shapes instinct, sharpens judgement and keeps leadership connected to the reality of what care means in people’s lives.
Experience matters in care leadership because care is personal. It always has been, and it always will be. The best leadership does not lose sight of that. It embraces it.
At its heart, care is about people. The more closely leadership is informed by real human experience, the stronger, safer and more compassionate the sector will become.
